A.Little.Long.Winded

I am dad

2010-07-27T08:17:00.000-07:00

I am dad
You whimper early in the morning
I’ll be there
To warm your bottle
Make sure you’re dry
Tuck your blanket back under your chin
I am dad

I am dad
I wonder sometimes
Now that you’ve turned five
And I see you sleeping
If you know just how much I adore you
And your wit
And your spunk
And your sensitivity to all things beautiful
I wonder if I’ve taught you all the lessons
You need to turn six
Or sixteen...God help me
I am dad

I am dad
I pray for you when I hear you sing
That God will use you and the gifts He’s given
And I’m trying not to say
I’ll always be your biggest fan
Because that sounds so cliché
But nothing else really describes it
I’ll love to hear your voice
Long after the adoring throngs have moved on
Or if the soaps and shampoos
Are your only listeners
I am dad

I am dad
I pray I lead you well
I’ll be here when you need me
And when you don’t
I am dad

Opposites...

2010-05-12T10:24:00.000-07:00

Read this quote on a comment to another great blog, Carlos Whittaker's Ragamuffin Soul. Good stuff. But today the blog wasn't the point...it was the COMMENT by MaRy Mo!!! at the bottom that stunned me...

Check it...
Chad

~~~~~~~~~~~

“The opposite of love is not hate, it’s indifference. The opposite of art is not ugliness, it’s indifference. The opposite of faith is not heresy, it’s indifference. And the opposite of life is not death, it’s indifference.” Elie Wiesel

2010-05-07T09:23:00.000-07:00

Dear Levi,

Your arrival came much quicker than I expected. But then again, I wasn’t the one carrying you...your mom probably feels a little differently about it. I really didn’t expect the 9 months to go quite so fast. Then all of a sudden, you were here. Amazing strength, vitality, fingers, toes, the chubbiest cheeks yet in a long line of chubby cheeked Smith kids, and as Ella called it, “a funny little mitten”... hadn’t seen that in the Smith babies yet.

The first time you opened those massive blues, you reminded me, in one split second, why it was I wanted to become a father. To raise Warrior Priests. Just like your sisters, you share some part of that meaning in your name. And I still pray daily that you live up to that.

But all that’s not why I’m writing.

We have to talk.

Man to man.

Remember when I said you arrived much quicker than I expected? Well, the speed of your arrival is a mere snail’s pace compared to the gallop you’ve taken to get to one year old.

Why?

Is there some great event for one year olds no one’s told me about that you just can’t wait to get to? Do you expect to be able to continue this pace through childhood? Pre-school will still be around. The little girls in elementary school will still giggle when you walk past in a few years the way they coo over you now...don’t sweat it. And I saw how you did a Heisman Trophy style stiff-arm to that puppy the other day that ran straight toward you to play...I assure you football will still be around when you get to high school, don’t rush it. And if you’re trying to speed through your early years in order to get to the college scene, we talked about this: if you’re going to go Ivy League, you gotta keep practicing your flash cards because the word list you’re supposed to know when you take your SAT’s and entrance exams is hard. And as for marriage, it’s like a fine painting. You can’t rush art. If it’s going to be a marriage as beautiful as you see in your mom and me, it’s going to take loads of time. And you have to paint it with a very small brush...so let’s slow it down so Mom and I can show you how to paint in the right kind of love. While we’re on the subject, it’s going to take me some time to figure out how to let some sweet girl steal the attention you’re supposed to be giving to beating off the guys coming around to visit your sisters. Remember, we talked about this too.

It all takes time. Slow it down. Time. Slow. Pace yourself.

This first year just went by way too fast and I can’t bear to think of the next few doing the same.

We have to learn so many things together. The life of Jesus. Music. Baseball. Fishing. Techie nerd stuff. It’s all so fun. Don’t rush through too fast...I don’t want to miss seeing your face as you learn them.

All I’m saying is, Happy Birthday, Buddy. But don’t let the next one come so soon.

Dad

Don't go....

REBLOG:: Listening / Musical Influences

2010-05-06T13:32:00.000-07:00

So in my blog-trolling, I came across this amazing piece by Peter James on the Hillsong Creative blog.

Here's the link to the original

...and here is my reprint!

Enjoy,

Chad

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As Musicians we HAVE to get really good at listening. Not just listening, but listening with the intent to learn. It’s one thing to listen to a song on the radio and go “that’s a nice song”. But it’s another thing to listen to that same song to learn from it and analyze every ounce of goodness out of it! We need to get into a habit of doing this to help us grow creatively, to widen our musical knowledge and ultimately make us better, well rounded musicians.

We can actually limit our growth in this area by our musical prejudices or simply our likes and dislikes. Don’t limit yourself by only listening to your favorite style, band, artist etc. We can learn something from ALL good music, full stop. Regardless of style. Don’t limit yourself either to only listening to Christian music. Yes Christian music will edify your soul and spirit which we all need. But music in itself isn’t secular or nonsecular. Yes lyrics can carry a positive or negative message, but don’t simply limit your musical influences just because a band or song may not fall under the ‘Christian’ genres. I’m not saying go out and listen to whatever music you want to regardless of it’s message etc. Use wisdom. But don’t limit yourself musically just because the band or artist may not be ‘Christian’.

To be creative we need to feed our creativity. And listening is one of the best ways of doing this. Limiting yourselves to only certain styles/bands/influences is kind of like a painter limiting him or herself to only one color. Yes the painter can be creative with that one color, but how much more creative can that painter be if they have a pallet full of colors with different shades and tones? How much more creative as musician can we be if we don’t limit ourselves to just one color/style/influence but have a great understanding of all styles and the tones, colours, rhythms etc that accompany them.

So what should we listen to when pulling a song to bits and analysing it? Well for one that depends on what we want to learn from that song. But for starters try analysing the instrument that best relates to you and try to think about these things in relation to your instrument.

1/ What tone or tones are they using?
- How does the tone fit within the style of the song?
- How are they producing this sound and how can i replicate it?

2/ How are they layering the sound?
- Are they using more than one sound?

3/ What effects are they using and why?
- How are they manipulating these effects in realtime?
- How can i incorporate some of these effects into my ’sound’?
- Delays, Filters (e.g. low pass filters), Reverb, Overdrive etc

4/ What kind of rhythms and riffs (parts) are they using and why?
- Are these riffs clashing with the other musicians parts and/or melody?
- Are these riffs leaving room for the other musicians and melody? If so how?

5/ What are they doing to build the song dynamically?
- Are they using the about 4 things: Effects, Tone, Layering, Rhythms & Riffs to do this?
- How can I learn from this and incorporate it into my playing.

Those are just a few things to get you started, I’m sure you can think of more, but that’s more than a good starting point.

As a musician wanting to continue growing and learning I’m always looking out for new bands and influences to help with this. I thought it’d be helpful if I listed a few of my own personal influences. Most of these bands have influenced Hillsong United and our ‘Sound’ as well by the way. Obviously there are more than just these, but these are a few of the main ones that I thought of:

Delirious
Passion Pit
Sigur Ros
Radiohead
M83
Keane
The Killers
Phoenix
Athlete

Anyways, I hope that helps and gets you all pumped to get even deeper into the world of listening!

Pete James

What it means to be a shepherd...

2010-04-30T06:35:00.000-07:00

So I was reading a blog today from Glen Packiam on "Recovering the Pastoral Vocation" and as I left a comment, I felt I learned a little about myself and the things Annette & I have been processing lately.

Let me know what you think...

~~~~~~~~~

Not that you need my 2 cents but this is something I'm learning daily. I've been frustrated with feeling like I AM being the shepherd I'm called to be but to sheep who don't necessarily want to listen or be led where I feel from God we should go.

Then I've been learning/remembering a few things lately...

1. they're not my sheep. They belong to God, I'm called to tend in obedience, not direct and lead in my own wisdom and strength. I'm not called to think for them or change their minds. Only the Good Shepherd can do that.

2. they've been under a different shepherd's care-or no care at all, wondering around by themselves for a long time before I got here...a good shepherd keeps tending until we both get it right...me the tending, they the trusting.

3. I'm still a sheep...my leading and tending as a shepherd is only as good as my learning and following...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

None of these things excuse me from obeying and teaching, leading and following, but they do take the pressure off me to "perform" in some way using mere numbers as a sign of disciple-revelation.

The other thing that I recognize is that in every "herd" there is always some level of INDIVIDUAL growth, whether the WHOLE herd grows at the same level or not. And I have to be honest, Annette and I have had more than one occasion lately where we've been blessed enough to see or hear of absolute, definite growth from several individuals. I realize that it's not often we may hear a definitive "I have grown in this way because of what I'm being taught", but God has blessed us lately with a few of those moments...and in the cyclical motion of discipleship, it's yet again another reminder that I should start again with lesson one above and continue.

Question of the Day...#1

2010-04-03T16:55:00.000-07:00

When I want to calm down, relax and get back to a place I can hear with my heart, I listen to ________________ (artist/song).

Secondhand Jesus ::: Part 1

2010-03-16T17:13:00.000-07:00

Now that I'm done with Butterfly in Brazil, I thought I’d continue with Packiam and his new book, Secondhand Jesus (Subtitled: “Trading rumors of God for a firsthand faith”). Pastor Don had read this book late last year and was really challenged by it and recommended all of us on staff at Bethany to read it as well.

The premise is simple: do we truly know God or have we simply believed the rumors we heard from our parents, teachers, pastors, friends, etc. Glenn’s (see how we’re on a first-name basis now!?) catalyst for the thoughts here began on “that Thursday” when he along with the rest of the staff and members of New Life Church learned, along with the rest of the world, that their beloved pastor, Ted Haggard had fallen. The hard-to-ask questions and harder-to-come-by answers led him to question pretty much everything he believed and how he had acquired his faith.

It’s a difficult thing for a man to be stretched in his faith in such crisis...no doubt about it.

I’m just glad there are men around willing to be honest with their difficulties and questions and let the rest of us in on their journey.

A few of the standout quotes so far really speak to me about our “Christian” culture, and just how Christ centric it really is....or isn’t.

Speaking of the difficulty to explain the fact that we believe “obedience begets blessing” and yet there is still pain/suffering/etc, in the world, he says,
“There are things in life beyond our control. And God is the first among them. God will not tolerate being used as an instrument to control our lives. Obedience isn’t some sort of magic code, an “Abracadabra” that moves God to action--or worse forces Him to action.”

and further...
“There are some things only God knows and understands. To deny as much is to have reduced God into our image.”

Yep. I’m challenged by this....

Do I believe in an “obey=blessing” formula?
Do I think that my action can in any way force God to act?
Or do I truly believe God is true, and obey, no matter the outcome or response to my obedience?

Anyone else wanna wrestle with this with me?

2010-03-12T06:15:00.000-08:00

So i guess i never finished my discussion on "Butterfly in Brazil"...

The problem is, if you look at my copy of the book, i probably highlighted 2-4 lines on every other page! And honestly, it's not that the ideas presented in the book are terribly unique or ground breaking, it’s the fact that they’re right. Accuracy is never cliché to me. If accuracy or the truth ever gets cliché, the Word loses it’s potency and we lose the power of our faith (...if “faith comes by hearing and hearing by the Word...” and if the Word has become cliché then it has lost it’s power...)

So let me summarize my thoughts on the book by quoting one section...

(p.90)
“We look at a church service, or a conference packed with people, and call our job to disciple others done. We sell books and CDs and convince ourselves that our calling to train people is being accomplished. ... But sales is not the same as impartation. An attendee is not a disciple. Mass communication doesn’t automatically mean personal transformation.”

I pray that our heart to change the things around us never falls to the level of numbers=discipleship, sales=impartation. O God, never let it be. God give us (the church) disciples, those who are fully devoted followers, LEARNERS UNDER DISCIPLINE.

Oh God,
Let change begin small (with me)
Let change begin locally, wherever I am.
Let change be gradual because if it’s big flash in the pan it won’t last.
Let the change that is given be exponential in growth...
for the glory of God and the growth of the Kingdom.

Butterfly In Brazil - Part 1

2010-02-08T08:43:00.001-08:00

Recently I was perusing the shelf at the office and “found” Glenn Packiam’s Butterfly In Brazil. I bought it a few years ago and, since I’m sure I was in the middle of seven other books at the time, I didn’t read it right away. Subsequently it was relegated to gather dust and wait. Sorry, Glenn. Here’s the thing: maybe that was no accident.

(buy the book HERE)

When I bought this book when it came out in 2007 I think I would have missed some of the most basic truths that it retells and would have missed some of the revelation that, as I read it now, is crystal clear to me. Thanks, Glenn, for writing

If you’re looking for a great, quick read, this is it. It’ll only take you a week’s worth of devotions (or trips to the, ahem, porcelain fixtured reading room). Read it....at least start....then let’s discuss!

If you haven’t read it yet (or started), you might want to stop reading this blog now...or maybe it’ll pique your interest.

~~~~~~~~~~~

As a premise for writing, I love the “Butterfly/Chaos Theory” concept. Several years ago, when I learned of several of the Chaos theories, I read anything I could find on the subject because I immediately had a spiritual perspective of what these theories could mean to the Christian. Packiam does a great job of building on these very thoughts: we cannot fathom the impact of the tiniest of our actions now in the light of eternity.

I resonate very deeply with many of Packiam’s personal explorations of dreams, goals and visions and the motives behind them. When we’re brought up on a steady diet of “God has such great plans for you” and “The Lord is going to use you in mighty ways” we develop this preconception of what those “great plans” and “mighty ways” will be. As a result, as we move through life and we don’t see those specific plans or ways, we, as Packiam puts it, “sort of TIVO’d our lives without really intending to--just hit ‘pause’ and put everything on hold’.” This TIVO mentality of pausing when we want to go do something else, then fast-fowarding to the “good parts” means that we’re effectively doing NOTHING while we wait for the big things to happen TO us.
“I know that God wants to use me to accomplish great things. So I’m going to store up all the greatness that’s building in me right now, and then one day I’ll find myself in an arena before thousands and thousands of people, and then--BAM--I’ll release all that greatness on everyone.” (pg 9)

Packiam goes on, in the next chapters, to develop the thought that if we would instead believe that EVERY moment is a designed opportunity for greatness in the upside-down Kingdom of God and these moments can have far reaching impact “more than all we ask or imagine” (Eph 3:20, NIV).

Any thoughts? Any quotes from the first several chapters that stuck out?

2010-02-07T04:08:00.000-08:00

Eugene Peterson, in a rare interview with Dean Nelson, 2007....

Eugene has just mentioned that he turned down an invitation to "hang out" with Bono because he was "facing a deadline, finishing The Message".

Dean Nelson: You may be the only person alive who would turn down the opportunity [to meet Bono] just to make a deadline. I mean come on! [Laughter] It's Bono for crying out loud!"

Peterson: Dean, It was Isaiah!

Yep, that's priority.

2010-02-07T04:06:00.000-08:00

here is my previous blog...

http://www.tumblr.com/tumblelog/pastorchad